Tag Archives: marriage

I do

LynPraying

God, but what an honor it is
to love and be loved by you!
For me, for you, for evermore
I die to the bright of your soul,
the kiss of your smile,
the glow of your too-often
set upon patience.

Do I love you with all that I can
at the twinge of every second? No.
I love you more than that,
I do.

up

For Lyn, of course.

The Bahá’í Faith recently completed its yearly fasting period. The opening lines of the poem came to me when I suddenly awoke at 3:00 AM on the last night of the fast. I remember being shocked with the clarity and completeness of it: having a poem arrive like that is something that rarely happens to me. Although tired, I was able to force myself to stay awake long enough to memorize it, so that it would still be with me the next morning. Thankfully it was!

Thank you for reading I do. I humbly appreciate your visiting the Book of Pain, and as always, I look forward to your comments.

The photograph of Lyn praying at the side of a small river was taken several years ago during a fall holiday to the Poconos in eastern Pennsylvania. To see my photography blog, please visit the Book of Bokeh.

john

Photograph, poem and notes © John Etheridge; all rights reserved. The poem and accompanying notes are licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported License. This applies to all original written work found on this site, unless noted otherwise. The attribution claimed under the license is: © John Etheridge,  https://bookofpain.wordpress.com. The photograph is not licensed for use in any way without the expressed consent of its creator.

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When it was just a game

Where were you on the 28th of September, 1972
when with 34 seconds left, Henderson saved your soul?
Me, I found myself lost in the uproar,
desperate to join the catharsis making the world
perfect for one perfect second.
But try as I might I couldn’t join in,
I knew it was just a game after all.

Look at my hands,
so much has changed since then:
the right one aches in the morning
and the left one still bears the scar
of that ring, sworn upon once
and then sworn upon again
but broken now and long since ended.

And Henderson? They say he found religion
and if so I am happy for him, I am.
And while I still don’t understand the uproar,
now I know it’s not just a game after all.
Is it Paul?

The game referred to in the poem is the final hockey game of the 1972 Canadian/Russian “Summit Series” tournament. For those interested, a full description of that event is included at the end of this post.

The Summit Series is, however, incidental to the poem. As an event it was famous and intense in its day but time has reduced it in importance and influence. My intent was to use it as a mirror to, and in contrast with, the end of my first marriage.

This is not revenge poetry—I have no ax to grind with my ex-wife. Our marriage was difficult, but equally so for each of us. The simple truth of it is that although we tried, we were just not meant to be life long companions. And from our marriage we have two sons we both love and with whom, even as we dissolved our union, we worked very hard to assure that this was about us, not them, and about our failings and not anything they did or did not do.

What did I learn? That marriage is not a game, to be fought with a sense of strategy in the hope to be the winner. But no matter the course of a marriage, ending one should be an occasion for sadness: so much promise, so much effort, so much pain—it’s inevitable that there should be some reflection and questioning.

Thank you for reading When hockey was just a game. I sincerely hope you have enjoyed it and I humbly appreciate your visiting the Book of Pain. As always, I look forward to your comments.

john

© 2013 by John Etheridge; all rights reserved. This poem and accompanying notes are licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported License. This applies to all original work found on this site, unless noted otherwise. The attribution claimed under the license is: © 2013 by John Etheridge, https://bookofpain.wordpress.com.

The Summit Series

In 1972, Canada had long been held at a disadvantage in international hockey tournaments as its best players were professionals in the National Hockey League and therefore ineligible to play at the World Championship and Olympic Games. As a result, Canadian and Soviet officials negotiated a first everm eight game September “Summit Series” in which any professional or amateur player could play. The series was a shock to the collective Canadian psyche; broad predictions of a Canadian sweep of the series were quickly proven wrong as the tournament began. The Russian team was good, fast and dogged; their goal tending  in particular, was superb. In the fifth game Paul Henderson scored to give Canada a 4 to 1 lead, but also suffered a concussion, although he was able to return. The heroics were for naught, however, as the Soviets came back to win that game. At that point they led the series 3-1-1 and appeared on the brink of taking the overall win. But Canada dug deep and after being toughened in a two game Swedish series en route to Russia, won the sixth and seventh games there, both on game winning goals by Paul Henderson.

The series by then, and in those cold, pre-detente days, had taken on a cultural sub-text: it was West vs East, democracy vs communism, the good guys against the bad, the elemental “us versus them.” It’s ridiculous now to think of the tournament in that fashion, but in 1972, that was what it had become. This difference was only magnified by the contrast of the game audiences: the Russians sitting quietly and watching intently, the few Canadian fans creating an almighty uproar that was almost loud enough to be heard “back home.” In the final, eighth game—Canada was essentially shut down to watch it live—the Soviets entered the third period leading with a 5 to 3 score. But goals by Phil Espisito and Yvan Cournoyer tied the game and the series. With only seconds left, Paul Henderson, after an initially blocked shot, came back from sliding into the rear boards and scored the winning goal, in a shot said to have caused all of Canada to simultaneously stand and scream out in one united roar. The good guys had won—barely—but they had won, and Paul Henderson was the undisputed hero of the tournament. Surprisingly—but perhaps not—the sudden fame was hard on Henderson, who struggled to keep his life and his family together. But eventually he did, becoming a born again Christian and finishing out his hockey career with distinction and going on in retirement from hockey to join the religious ministry.

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And so we will

The shadowed morning trail of hearts and scents,
touching…
the salts of hellos and the salts of goodbyes,
reaching…
mirrors to me, mirrors to you,
whispering…

In the days and in the nights,
in our movement and in our stillness
there are quiet words yet aplenty to be said.
But not now, not tonight, not tomorrow, not yet,
let the echoes fall where they will.

I wrote this poem when I was spending a lot of time travelling. At the time, Lyn and I were just married and the thought, and fact, of being away from her were hard. It still is on the rare occasion that I travel without her.

Thank you for reading And so we will. I sincerely hope you have enjoyed it and I humbly appreciate your visiting the Book of Pain. As always, I look forward to your comments.

john

© 2013 by John Etheridge; all rights reserved. This poem and accompanying notes are licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported License. This applies to all original work found on this site, unless noted otherwise. The attribution claimed under the license is: © 2013 by John Etheridge, https://bookofpain.wordpress.com.

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Too close for comfort

It’s not just a word, it’s a gulf,
not just a step but a fall.
And it’s not just a touch, it’s a life,
a life to be lived when it’s gone.
So rue us for being us
with our hearts bound up long ago
and our coffee made more bitter
with tears: too proud to remember,
too silly to forget
and too us to understand.
Rue us.

Thank you for reading Too close for comfort. I sincerely hope you have enjoyed it and I humbly appreciate your visiting the Book of Pain. As always, I look forward to your comments.

john

© 2012 by John Etheridge; all rights reserved. This poem and accompanying notes are licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported License. This applies to all original work found on this site, unless noted otherwise. The attribution claimed under the license is: © 2012 by John Etheridge, https://bookofpain.wordpress.com.

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